Monarchy Figurines



Monarchy figurines: the gruesome twosome

There is a really annoying couple of people who have recently been thrust into the public spotlight by a bored media. They have as much charisma as a dried fig, shrivelled and spat out by a diseased badger. Their sense of style is dictated by vermin being paid far too much tax payers money to adorn their 'common' subjects. I am talking about Princess Kate Middleton and her plain jane sister Pippa. Although both are never out of the 'news' these days, they have absolutely nothing worthwhile to say and they are in the news for no reason other than to add a shot of life into the decaying corpse of the royal family.

My own favourite fairy tale being spun about the prince and the pauper, or anti-christ Prince William an his common wife Princess Kate, is so laughably inaccurate that it hurts. But alas the other common folk believe Kate and her sister to be from their socia strata. Such illusions are hard to break but if you do a modicum of research you realise that 'plebeian' Kate is in fact related to Prince William through a common ancestor. Kate and her sister are also from a wealthy family and only date royalty or high flying bankers. Gee, how I can relate to the world they come from. They could almost be my very own sisters.

So the point of this picture is to draw attention to the fact that every brainwashed woman and girl in this country is obsessed with the arse of Pippa Middleton and with the clothes both Kate and Pippa wear. Behind the facade of sibling kindness there is a deep, dark narcississm in preening through Pippa, who is possibly the most overrated female in history. Alongside this is the nervousness and awkward posturing of Kate who is probably a little bit concerned for her own safety given the fate that befell Princess Diana after she accomplished the Roya Family's goal of being their broodmare. Once Kate gives birth to a son and heir to William how much longer will she last?

That said I hope our readers will enjoy thinking about what kind of clothes they can fit Princess Kate and her beautiful, stunning, truly splendid, talented, gorgeous, amazing, perfect, goddess-like, sister, Pippa.

God Save the Queen and her lovely children.

By Raygun