The many faces of 'Victoria Beckham' part 2



Botox Confusion

Here we are again with another amazing insight into the staggeringly diverse, and hugely talented modelling life of the humanoid pin 'Victoria Beckham'.

The picture we have here is one of such incredible versatility it's quite difficult to tell where the neck finishes and the head starts. It almost feels like you are being drawn into a natural vacuum of infinite nowhere nothingness, which is a bit like putting a huge sock on your head and being un-ceremoniously dumped in the middle of the desert by a long forgotten friend who to be honest your not actually sure if you really know who they were in the first place.

With all of this oblique modelling skill it is very easy to see why 'Victoria Beckham' has been able to do all that stuff that she has done before she did all that other stuff..you know before that other stuff that she did..whatever that was..?

Anyway here is one of 'Victoria Beckham's' most memorable poses.

Enjoy!

                                                                                                               By Roland Barnacle

Art squit

Abstract 2

This abstract painting is another example of not only my inability to paint, but it is also an example of how pure expression can release our inner most feelings.

The painting was again done on 8ft by 4ft hardboard, and is mounted on the wall inside the main entrance at Instant Nowhere Korporation Ltd's premises.

By the way answers on a postcard if you have any idea how I was feeling when I created this abstract painting..I really do not have a clue?

                                                                                                                    By Heston Quiff

How the stars relax part 1: Piers Morgan

                       

What a great guy I am

Piers Morgan, vile length of decomposing flesh, and the only reason why the death penalty should exist likes to relax by drifting over the countryside in his private hot air balloon, and dropping stale sandwiches from enormous heights onto the heads of rosey faced Farmers.

Invisible Career

there's blood on your costume plants

from his shrinking mentality

oh, come and turn the walls grey

why not pour your culture into a mire

turn your vices into products

living like this

he has a penchant for broken horrors

he's just a fucking salesman

corpses are improvements

they will all want dignity

the exhibitionism of baring the soul

is usually practiced by the blind

waiting eventually turns one into a lobby

the rising hand of hell grips my bitter teeth

language neither living nor dead

servant aping the master

poets only pretend to die

instant celebrity machine

mirrors reflect too much

i feel like ripping my jaw bone from my skull

anything to break this anxiety

this continual ridicule of being nowhere

sick to death of the stale air

the endless exhibition of squalor

a plastic moment in an invisible career

by Raygun